Protein 4 PM Cherry Bombs (5 servings @ 150 cal/ea)

Here’s to a new fun meal-type to add to our weekly cooking. Protein bar attempt two: success!

½ cup dried cherries
4 tbsp baking cocoa
1/2 cup dried coconut
3 scoops Hemp protein powder
2 egg whites
2 tbsp coconut cream
¼ cup almond flakes (optional)

Preheat oven to 350F.

Mix egg whites and coconut cream with baking cocoa, coconut shreds, and Hemp protein.

Scoop out about half of a cookie sized lump and flatten in palms.

If you have patience, roll around a single dried cherry. If you’re impatient like me, dump the cherries in, mix, and spoon-scoop into a ball.

Roll the protein covered cherry in additional coconut shreds or almond flakes.

Place on parchment lined cookie sheet and bake for 10-15 minutes.


Paleo Pumpkin Patties (6 patties @ 120 cal/ea.)

I’m not going to lie to you: these were supposed to be bagels. Ah bagels, how I’ve missed you. You used to be popped in my toaster every morning, but you were made out of processed bleached flour, preservatives, and boiled with no love. Lender’s frozen bagels – meet TWENTYSOMETHINGAND PALEO Pumpkin Patties. They don’t have holes, they’re not dense and chewy BUT you can’t really go wrong with pumpkin baked goods AND they’re KILLER when warm with some melty coconut cream smeared on top. F cream cheese (sorry Philadelphia)

15 oz can pumpkin puree
¼ cup almond meal or flour
2 tbsp coconut flour
2 eggs
2 tbsp water
1 tbsp lemon juice
3 tbsp honey
2 tbsp cinnamon
3 tbsp pumpkin pie spice (if you have it)
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt.

Preheat oven to 350F.

Mix wet ingredients (i.e. pumpkin, eggs, water, lemon juice and honey) then mix in the dry ingredients (i.e. almond meal, coconut flour, cinnamon, pumpkin pie spice, baking soda and salt).

Plop nicely on a cookie sheet and bake for 17-20 minutes.

Let cool, and then bag it up for freezing.

Upside-down Apple Paleo Cakes


I live in apple country, and even though I’ve lived in the northeast my entire life, I’ve never appreciated apples as much as when I’ve been Paleo. Gala all the way. Lets keep that doctor away.

Upside Down Paleo Apple Cakes

2 apples
1/2 cup apple sauce
¼ cup almond meal
2 tbsp coconut flour
1 egg
½ tbsp baking powder
1/2 tbsp coconut oil
4 tbsp honey
1 tbsp cinnamon
½ tsp nutmeg
2-4 tbsp crushed walnuts or pecans

Preheat oven to 350F and grease muffin tins a bit with coconut oil.

Slice 1 apple into 6 rounds, and pick away any seeds or hard bits in the middle. Cube up the second apple without the skins of the apple.

Mix cubed apples, egg, melted coconut oil, 2 tbsp honey, nutmeg, ½ tbsp cinnamon and crushed walnuts together.

Stir in the almond and coconut flour with the baking powder.

Pour slightly less than ½ tbsp of honey into the bottom of each muffin tin cup, followed by a dash of cinnamon.

Lay one apple round in each cup on top of the honey and cinnamon.

Pour batter evenly overtop each apple round.

Bake for 25-30 minutes.

Miss Piggy Fingers and Kermit Fries (2 servings @ 255 cal/ea)


Miss Piggy Fingers and Kermit Fries (3 servings @ 255 cal/ea)

½ lb lean pork tender loin
1 slice unadultered bacon
2 zucchini
1 egg
2 tbsp paprika
¼ cup almond meal/flour

Preheat oven to 350F.

Cut ends off zucchini, cut into two chunks, then slice into zucchini strips.

Beat egg in a bowl and dip zucchini strips and then into almond meal.

Lay on a piece of parchment paper ontop of a cookie sheet.

Bake for 25 minutes.

While Kermit fries bake, slice tenderloin into 2-3 cm thick slices.

Mix the rest of the almond meal with paprika (any spice you desire, actually) and bread the Miss Piggy.

Render fat from bacon in a frying pan, and either eat it immediately after cooking, or chop it up and sprinkle on top of Miss Piggy Fingers during packaging.

“Fry” the Piggy strips in the bacon fat and set aside to cool while Kermit fries finish.

Let cool, and then package up for freezing!


Homemade Andouille Jambalya (2 servings @ 280 cal/ea)


Easy Cajun sticking with the spicy diet (promotes weight loss). If you can’t take the heat, don’t go to Louisiana and don’t make this recipe! But you should make it because its delicious. PS Jicama rice = WAY BETTER than cauliflower rice.


1/2 lb pork shoulder
½ tsp paprika
1 tbsp garlic, chopped
1/2 tbsp chili powder
¼ tbsp crushed red pepper
1/8 tbsp cumin
pinch of: thyme, oregano, cayenne, onion powder, black pepper, chipotle.

In food processor, blend all ingredients (starting with the pork – adding the rest)

Shape into flat rounds, or balls (it’s up to you) and lightly brown in a skillet. The meat will be cooked all the way through later.

Set sausage to the side after browning.


1 sm yellow onion, chopped
½ green bell pepper
½ jicama or cauliflower (aprox 1-2 cups)
3 oz tomato paste
7 oz diced tomatoes (or 2 real chopped tomatoes)
½ tsp paprika
½ tsp oregano
¼ tsp thyme
¼ tsp parsley
¼ tsp cayenne

Food process/blend Jicama until becomes “ricey” in size. Squeeze out excess moisture in a towel (and really use those paleo muscles too).

Sautee chopped garlic, onion, and pepper in the sausage-fatty skillet on medium heat.

Pour ½ cup water into a jar with a lid, add the spices, and shake.

Add the jicama rice, sausage, and spice-water into the skillet and let cook, covered, 5 minutes.

Add the tomato paste and tomatoes, stir, and continue to let cook, covered, 5-10 minutes until desired consistency.


Blue Cocoa 4 PM Protein Bars: (6 bars @ 150 cal/ea)


I don’t know about you but 4pm is when my will is at its weakest. Running on a morning-people circadian rhythm makes afternoons rough. Once i start working out after work I’m good to go but I definitely need to start incorporating a protein power boost. Larabars have been rocking my world but its time to go home made. Blue cocoa protein bars are a lovely start.

1/3 cup seeds (pumpkin/pepitas, sunflower, sesame)
1/6 cup raw coconut shreds (unsweetened)
2 tbsp nut butter (I use Justin’s chocolate hazelnut)
1 tbsp coconut oil
2 tbsp almond flour
1 tbsp 100% cocoa powder
½ tsp vanilla extract
1 scoop Hemp protein powder
1 egg white
¼ cup dried blueberries

Preheat oven to 350F.

Toast seeds on a cookie sheet until golden brown (shaking the tray periodically).

Dump in blender/food processor and pulse until slightly larger than the consistency of bread crumbs.

Melt coconut oil and nut butter together in the microwave (aprox 30 seconds on high).

Stir in vanilla extract and a dash of salt if you’re the salt type.

Stir in seed mix, almond flour, cocoa powder, and protein powder until well blended.

Stir in egg white and blueberries last.

Press into a muffin tin or an 8×8 pan/baking dish.

Sprinkle extra blueberries or coconut on top if you’d like.

Bake for another 10-15 minutes until coconut starts browning.

Let cool and slice it up!


Slow Cooker Chicken Vindaloo and Jicama Rice (4 servings @ 215 cal/ea.)


This bad boy has been on the “to make” list for a while now. It was actually my slow-cooker’s first go (woo! Go crock pot! Way to rock your first time!) I’ve never had proper vindaloo so I couldn’t guarantee that it’s as good as the real deal but its pretty freaking delicious! And the Indian spiced jicama rice is good enough to be a meal of its own (if it had more protein of course)

Slow Cooker Chicken Vindaloo with Jicama Rice: (4 servings @ 215 cal/ea)

1 lb chicken breast
2 yellow onions
2 inches of fresh ginger, chopped
6 garlic cloves, chopped
2 seranno
½ tbsp turmeric
½ tbsp coriander
½ tbsp garam masala
½ tsp cinnamon
1 tbsp salt and pepper
1 tsp mustard

Chop up (and seed) the Seranno, Onion, and Garlic.

Sautee Seranno, half of garlic and onion until soft, then puree in the food processor/blender.

Add the pureed veggie sautee into the slow cooker with all of the spices.

Chop chicken breast into 1” pieces and add to slow cooker with 1/8 cup water.

Cook on LOW for 6 hours, checking in after about halfway to stir.

1 medium Jicama
1 tsp fenugreek
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp cardamom
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp coriander
1 tsp cayenne

Blend/food process Jicama into rice-sized pieces.

Mix in sautee pan with all of the spices and ½ cup water.

Let cook, covered, for about 5-8 minutes.